Most of us are doing the best we can to find whatever the right balance is . . .
For me, that balance is family, work, and service."  - Hillary Rodham Clinton

I am not a big fan of Hillary Clinton.  Never have been.  I know, I could be kidnapped and anchored to the bottom of the Pacific Ocean for saying it.  But, I’m a New Yorker and we’re known for our honesty at the cost of popularity.  But, this isn’t a diatribe against Secretary of State Clinton.  This is about my agreement with this quote.

Most of us are doing the best we can to find whatever the right balance is…

What is the “right” balance?  What is the wrong balance?  What is balance?

Here are the first three definitions of “balance” on www.dictionary.com

1.    A state of equilibrium or equipoise; equal distribution of weight, amount, etc.

2.    Something used to produce equilibrium; counterpoise

3.    Mental steadiness or emotional stability; habit of calm behavior, judgment, etc.*

I love looking up words; especially words I already know the meaning of.  Because, I realize that no matter how I define a word, there is always an objective definition that will always challenge us if we allow it.

I like the third definition best and it seems to be the most practical and relevant to today’s society.  Mental steadiness.  I’d like that.  Emotional stability.  Sign me up.  Habit of calm behavior?  I have a temper at times, so yes, some of that, please…

But, how do we achieve this “habit of calm behavior”… this equilibrium in life.  For many, it is through spiritual, faith-filled journeys… for others, it is a bi-monthly day at the spa… even still, for others, they are trying to figure it out and as Clinton says doing their best to find whatever the right balance is…

Within my community of friends, artists and colleagues, I find two governing mentalities.  Those who like to work, and do.  And, those who don’t like to work, and try not to.  For the former group (of which I fall into), the challenge is finding that work-life balance when the heavy demands of a job come calling on a daily basis.  Most of my friends are artists – actors, writers, musicians, directors, etc.  And, most of them have to work a “day job” to pay the bills.  Nothing uncommon there.  But, for those who pursue excellence in their day job to support the excellence they pursue in their artistic life, striking a balance between the two becomes progressively more and more difficult.  I know, because I’ve been trying to find that balance my whole life. 

When one is taken away from his/her passions in order to merely support the opportunity to pursue the passion, it creates a strange sensation and frustrating reality.  We have to do one in order to do the other; yet, at the same time, we are doing more of one and less of the other.  In fact, the more we do of one, it is almost guaranteed that we will do less of the other.  This is what I would humbly call “imbalance”.  I am going through it right now.  My job is demanding so much of me right now.  I am grateful for it. I love what I do.  I love who I work with – my second family (after all, we spend more time with the people we work with than the people we most love). 

Making art is not like paying bills or grocery shopping or mowing the lawn (for those who actually have a lawn).  Those are very specific tasks you can allot time for and are actually guaranteed to complete them, assuming, of course, you do them.  But, making art – writing, sculpting, painting, etc. – you can allot a chunk of time and nothing could come during that period.  Or, a good deal could.  The discipline is showing up to work – the miracle is when work is produced.  And, then 90% of what is produced is eventually discarded, whether by self, others or the “industry” (I hate that term – it’s so dehumanizing to artists).  So, although you set aside time and energy to create, there is no guarantee there will be creation. 

Which is why it is important to always remember that when we are NOT creating (at the day job, on the subway, stuck in traffic on the 405, mowing the lawn, etc.) we actually are most fertile because our “art” is not the centerpiece of our attention.  And, in some strange, inexplicable way, we are still creating by simply doing other, less profound activity.  That’s my experience, at least.    And, when we can begin to embrace that our lives and the balance we are all doing our best to find, is an ongoing work-in-progress, I think we will be in the best position to find – and enjoy – a work-life balance.  After all, this kind of balance can bring equilibrium, emotional stability and habit of calm behavior.

I certainly would agree with Hillary Clinton with what she finds to be an appropriate balance – family, work and service.  That is a good starting point. 

I really encourage us all to continue working hard to find the balance among the top priorities in our life.  We make time for what is most important and we would do well to do our best to find  whatever the right balance is.

Michael Albanese is a playwright and screenwriter. A recent transplant to Los Angeles from New York, he loves, in no particular order, all things Italian, art, films, music, theatre, food, wine, etc.  He drinks a lot of coffee and knows just enough about sports to get by.  He has vast experience in the entertainment, hospitality and service industries and at one point in life, wanted to be a dentist.  He lives with his best friend, who happens to be his wife.  He finds his pursuit for balance to often be quite imbalanced.